- The t.p. in this house sucks. Curtis wanted to try something new and bought a case of Scots? from Costco... it's HORRIBLE. I feel like I'm at the airport everytime I go potty!
- A few Sundays ago Ethan came downstairs from changing clothes a little too quickly after church. Turns out he had worn a complete outfit of regular clothes under his church clothes to church that day. Including jeans and socks. How uncomfortable is that? And how did I not notice? (Oh wait, just thinking about Sunday mornings makes the answer very obvious!)
- Dinner time around here is outrageous. It goes something like this:
Me: Ok guys, time for dinner, Ethan will you say the prayer?
Jonah: jumps down from his chair and gets batman
Eli: not IN his chair, he's in the family room whining about why his life is so unfair
Ethan: Over talking to Janie Kate in her stroller
Me: wait... wait... ask again
Ethan: ok
Eli: Slowly making his way to the table. Now he's too TIIRRRED!!
Jonah: Showing Batman to JK, oops LIL CAPOO ANNETS, Kashi um paba?
Eli: It's not fair that JONAH gets to sit by JANIE. Runs over and moves her stroller.
Jonah: Screams and pulls back
Janie: Does LIL CAPOO mean tug of war??
Me: Seriously thinking about uncorking that bottle of wine that a co-worker gave Curtis for Christmas. wait... we don't have a corkscrew...
20 minutes later finally we have a prayer that usually has the word doody in it.
Eli: I don't like this. it looks like worms... no POOP!!
Jo: HA HA HA
Ethan: HA HA HA... I have GAS!
Eli: HA HA HA
Jo: HA HA HA
Jo: Henry and Kyle at my school say: WE HAVE GAS! HA HA HA
Ethan: No they don't, you just copied me
Jo: Well they awe SIX!!
Ethan: No they're not, if they were six they would be in Alpine!
Jonah: I have to go potty...(runs to the bathroom hasn't eaten ONE bite)
Eli: I weally don't like this, I wish I could have CANDY
Me: Snorting sound through nose. Eating as fast as I can and still thinking about that wine...
Jonah: comes back way to fast, hasn't washed his hands
Me: totally don't remind him even though I'm a little grossed out
Eli: ok, I'm going to get some candy
Me: get back in your chair and eat your dinner! NOW!
Ethan: When I'm in ninth grade after I build the omnitrix I'm going to build a special suit that's metal underwear and when you push your weiney it makes metal go over your whole body... it will be a metal underwear suit!!
Me: um...(disturbing on so many levels)...
Jonah: Has gotten up and down from his chair at least 5 times since he went potty... now he's laying on the couch with Eli rubbing the food from the ONE bit he took into the cushions.
To be Continued...
p.s. Curtis: Is enjoying nice quiet dinners with adult conversation this week.
11 comments:
OK. So I saw a good deal at Cosco... Given the amount of time I have spent in Airports over the past month, I didn't even notice how bad it was....sorry Sweetheart!
We tried to bribe our relocation appraisers with that bottle of wine...no takers...looks like it is time to get it out of the house...
Speaking of wine...NJ is weird wine country. More often than not when we go to dinner, everyone around us is drinking wine...but it is not on the menu...because most restaurants (notice I didn't say Diners...which is a whole other topic) don't have a liquor license. So we asked a friend, why and how. Response was that it is a symbol of status (high society enjoys a fine wine at dinner...funny)...and there is a clause in the liquor law that permits consumption without a license as long as it is brought in sealed. Beck and I have our own way of declaring our societal status...we show up at the restaurant and relive the dialogue that Beck just described in this post... :)
That definately sounds rough! Good luck with that battle.....
Ok...I don't think I have laughed so hard in quite some time! Becky, you are hilarious and I cannot wait until you move back here and we get to hang out together again. You have an incredible gift to put words together and get them in print. I am inspired. Have a good one and I hope to see you soon!!!
Oh, you crack me up!
You get an A for effort for even attempting dinner while your husband is out of town. When Ryan is out of town we usually have pizza, McDonald's, or some kind of "meat" in the form of nuggets or sticks. :)
That was completely genius Becky! I am still laughing
Thanks for your kind comments:) But it really was, word for word, what happened at dinner last night! And if you think it's funny it's because you have also gone through something very similar!!
don't tell me this. joel just bought a gigantic box of scot tp because it was on sale even after i specifically asked him to get a different kind of paper. sometimes when he does things to make my life easier, it really doesn't. good intentions.
Oh, we are so living the same life!! You are so funny!
Oh, and let me say this: baby wipes!! We don't even use t.p. around here. Keith refuses. He likes a "clean, fresh feeling!" I guess you're really not supposed to flush them, but I haven't seen a problem yet, although we may end up with a few more clogged toilets than the average family. :)
So, maybe it runs in the family...I bought that same toilet paper. Never again! I put it in the cupboard next to the main floor bathroom just so it would get used up quicker! I didn't realize I was a tp snob...well, maybe I did. Wait, what' my line? "I'm totally fine with that".
That was a good laugh! I love the two layers of clothes.....he's a thinker isn't he. The dinner ordeal was quite amusing. I've been there - only not quite as many kids and I am sure mine involved yelling. I am glad you survived it....Thanks for the laugh.
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